the passionable cafe of rae

"Hrmm, I'm trying to break some procrastination habits by getting this paper done 2 days early and I still haven't started. Right now I have nothing to do, but I still would rather play Solitaire or check my facebook than start this thing. lol"

This is what I posted on my FB status about an hour ago and since then I've written a fancy sentence on a once blank document that hasn't been named or saved yet. So far so good! lol not. But I've decided I have plenty of time to do it tomorrow when I'm REALLY bored at workstudy tomorrow evening. I pray I actually do it then. Or maybe even before! Then I can at least say I've written the paper a day early. :)

hehe, I'm really tempted to watch another episode of Kimi No Todoke before I go to bed. It's exactly like the manga, too, which means I'll be reading the rest when I'm done with the anime. lol

Yesterday I was supposed to have explained more about my future job, but yeah, it didn't happen. (ΘεΘ;)

My worries are eased now though because I was called by the hiring manager Friday morning saying I'd start my training on Tuesday after class. I'll have 24 training hours. :D I'm excited about starting, but I'm sure I'll get tired of it after a few weeks. hehe

And I need some khaki pants for work. I don't wear regular pants anymore. I almost always wear skinnies if they're ever long pants, so I googled where I'd find khaki skinnies. lol I'll be going to Target tomorrow.

Didn't do too much this weekend. Gwyn and I went out a few times, mostly to just eat somewhere. We did go to Northlake Mall yesterday, and that was enjoyable, as always. But dang, it's too cold!!! I don't even want to leave the apartment, man! It's supposed to snow again Tuesday, and Gwyn and I both are already done with seeing snow, lol.

We got more junk food at Walmart. I also got some more pens and paper for class, some poster board to tack up on a bare wall in my room for some more flare, and a desk calendar for organizing my life! haha.

I wanted to fill up the poster boards with doodles and nonsense, so I bought some sharpies too. Isn't that exciting?!

It's almost the end of the academic year and Gwyn and I still haven't figured out where we're gonna live over the summer. I have a job now so I'm totally staying in Charlotte this summer. But, of course, I won't have City View to live in during that time, so I need to start seriously finding a place and having one soon so I won't be stuck when the time comes, ya know?

And there's this lottery the school's doing for 3rd and 4th years students who would like to have a spot in City View next year, and there's a $50 fee to have your name randomly selected. That's a waste of money if you're not even guaranteed a spot. I don't want to live there next year anyway. :/

Apartments are really cheap near UNCC, so getting one may be easier than I'm thinking, but I still kinda want to rent a house if we get enough roommates. I say "but" alot. ugh.

Anyway, I'm gonna go now. I need to go to bed soon. :D

Peace for now! <3

- Raeven

I caught another cold. This usually doesn't happen to me so close to the other one I had back in November, even though the one in November was a weak one (Again, I rarely ever get sick). This one's a little stronger. It actually came with a fever, and I'm at work right now, shiverin my buns off. I'm a little warmer now cuz I put my jacket on, but yeah, I'm not looking forward to the walk home.

You know when you're not feeling well and you have a fever of any level and your skin's just sensitive? Like, you don't want your skin to rub up on the clothes you're wearing or anything? That's how I feel now. And my body's a little richetty. My head's swimming, and my voice is low. :P

Hehe, the one cool thing I like when I have a cold though is that while my voice is smoky from being sore, it makes me sing better. At least, that's what I think in the shower. I wish my singing voice was like this everyday! :D

I went to all my classes today except for Macroeconomics, my last class in the evening, overslept during my nap between classes and was late for the Psychology test. But overall, the day was better than I thought it would be. I thought I wouldn't want to get out of bed this morning, but after taking a shower, I was fine for most of the day though my face hurt --maybe sinuses?). Gwyn and I caught this thing together. She caught it first, then I picked it up just yesterday. keke.

I don't know how well I did on the test, but I'm not too worried. I've been doing good so far, gettin A's on my quizzes. One thing that surprised me though, was that even though I was 15 minutes late, literally rushed out of my apartment to get there, coming into a classroom to everyone stopping their tests to stare at me for a second, I had no anxiety. That's a first in a very long time! A couple years ago, I picked up this restlessness in organized crowded places. I didn't feel comfortable in the classroom or any other kinds of gatherings where you had to sit down and focus attention on an authority in front of you. Actually, the one thing I worried about on my first days of academic classes were that I may end up with a seat in the front, close to the front, or dead center, away from a door I can slip away to if I needed to.

Every day, at some point of the alotted time in the classroom (if I'm feeling uncomfortable, which is most of the time in these situations), I'd get so restless and anxious that it was hard to concentrate and I thought everyone was looking at me, that they thought I was crazy. It's far-fetched, but I've programmed myself to think this way for too long. Now I'm trying to program it back, but it's not gonna happen all at once. I'm not going to settle with saying that being around people makes me anxious. It's an easy excuse shy people can get away with, but it's not going to be me.

But anyway, yes, I was surprised. Maybe the fact that I just woke up, was a little hazy in the head, and I was too strung on being there in enough time for the test(that my professor hadn't kicked me out for being so late) to care. All the other times I've been put in pressing situations like that I've freaked out inside. But this time it didn't . So now I ask myself why can't I not care like I did today? Why don't I just tell myself my education's more important than how I'm looking in the classroom or anywhee else? I'm gonna practice that. I'm gonna focus on that and see what happens. :D (hmph!)

Rachel came over and picked Gwyn and I up to go out somewhere a few hours ago. We went to Amelie's and played card games and talked. It was very enjoyable! xD They dropped me off at the library when I had to go to work and hit the movies. They're seeing Tangled right now. I wanted to see that!;_;

After I got dropped off was when my body decided to be a meanie. So now I'm feeling like a grandpa all old and crippled in his rocking chair (envision this with me, folks) Oh, and I lost my key card again. lol I called Amelie's and they didn't see it, so maybe I left it back home. PPPPRRREAZZZZEEE BE BACK HOME!

<3

P.S. - The girl who works with me on my shifts always has her guy friend talking to her in deep convo across the desk for hours! He's alot like me in alot of ways. He thinks about relationships like me, actually wants a friend before a gf. I've been nosy with their convos, but they gladly let me in, so I've been talking with them, killing time.

At one point, my coworker left to get her things and he said the guy I checked out dvds to was flirting with me:

me: "lol, I know, but ermurgh (sideways glance) - I wasn't interested.
him: "probably wanted you to watch those movies with him."
me: "Yeah, no, not gonna happen keke"
*cackles together*
me: "Yeah, I'm kinda picky. My friends have started to say that about me."
him: "but that's good. You know what you want and you shouldn't settle for less"
*I nod nod nod*
him: "Don't let your friends say that about you because they've probably moved to fast with past relationships"
*screech* *clear throat*
me: "oh no, the friends I do have are very close to me, they know me. When they said I was picky, they meant it in a good way"
*then he nods, approves*
him: "oh ok, well then that's very good!"

:D
It was a really nice convo. I APPROVE OF GUYS LIKE THIS! But I'm not really attracted to this one. >.> I mean, we can totally talk in the future, and I say whatever happens (with any guy I talk to),happens. If it's meant to be, fine. But yeah, we just talked. :) And what I love most is that he wasn't flirting at all, just wanted to talk. I LOVE THAT.

So bai for now! A mission for a part time profession is underway for Gwyn and I tomorrow. WE WILL BOTH COME OUT OF IT IN TRIUMPH AND VICTORY!!!

lovebeans. I'm out. <3333333

OH YEAH. TVXQ's Keep Your Head Down. It was THA BOSS. BOSSIN IT UP AND SERVIN IT TO JYJ. Whatever the media says about it, I know it was for JYJ and I'm glad they did it. It'll hopefully knock some gay out of Yoochun and make me love him a little again. Or it'll just make him cower in a corner and a cling to Jaejoong wondering what trash they've made Kanye West rap to and why Homin came out singing like the gourmet biscuits they've always been while JYJ has two of the best singers and sound like a sad outdated can of Pilsbury dough.

Kay, now I'm really out. xD

- Raeven

It's been a long time! Spring term is beginning tomorrow! And I have academic classes for the first time this year. It's pretty exciting. I don't have to get up super early except on Wednesdays, I don't have to wear my chef outfit except on Wednesdays, and I don't have classes at all on Mondays. 

My classes this term: 

Baking Science (same hours as lab classes: 7am-1pm) on Wed. 
Leadership (NONONO - insert Jokwon here - ) on Tuesdays and Thursdays 
Food & Beverage Cost Control - on Tues. and Thurs. 
Sanitation on Tues. 

I don't know what to expect, but hopefully, it's just a repeat of CCS, if not easier. I heard there's alot of writing and craziness in Baking Science and that Cost Control class doesn't help it at all, but I'm just hoping it's something like Mrs. Carter's workload. I can deal with that if I had to. 

Over Spring Break, I practically had the campus to myself. The first few days made me stir crazy with the loneliness. I talked to myself more than normal. And I think I was emotionally vulnerable, but I was fine after the break started to come to an end. Ariel, Olivia, and Alexis(another Alexis. We call this one Sandycheeks <3) went to stay in Lake Norman for three days in a Marriot hotel. They invited me to stay with them for free, but I just stayed in my dorm. I wanted to get things done, but I didn't do anything, really. lol I was supposed to work on the book, but I sat around with the file open.  NOTHING WAS DONE. I took over the whole common room for two nights and watched tv in there, played sims. It was great. But I didn't even keep up with Rosetta Stone. I got it to learn Korean. And I AM going to learn it. I'm currently on Unit 2, and so far, so good. I know some colors, I can ask "What is this?"; I can count to 6, and read some words, so it's coming along. I enjoy doing it. It's fun. That must mean I'm obsessed with Korea. I am. lol 

I'm gonna dye my hair. It's happening Wednesday. I'm afraid, because it's gonna be lighter and louder, but my biggest worry is if it doesn't compliment my skin. I'm going with a red. The red Tyra Banks sported a few times. 



Yeah. That's all I want to say today. That, and I've made an observation. Stasha, Gwyn, and I are attractive singles. Like, we've been single all our lives! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE! Find us, perfect boys! My goodness. >.>;;; Yes, I'm frustrated. We're getting old! pffft.

Anyways. Oh yeah. While I was alone last week, I sang a song by James Fauntleroy and made my voice chipmunk. It sounds all Disney at the end, but I think it's pretty cute. lol And I improvised on like, two words, because James Fauntleroy doesn't seem to have lyrics for any of his songs, so. . . bear with me. I had fun doing it, so I think I'm gonna do it often. heehee! <3 Listen prease! 

http://mediafire.com/file/?myzmzzmytym


be blessed. 

- Raeven